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Divorce Journal – The Tables Are Turning

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You cannot treat someone a certain way and expect them to believe your words.  A reasonable person will respond in a manner that gives them the best personal outcome.  It is called self-preservation.

Her reaction was to return to behaviors that placed the relationship in jeopardy from the beginning.  Wisdom would suggest that if something did not workout well over an extended period of time, then you must choose a different action.
Prior to this entry (Divorce Journal – The Tables Are Turning), I was beginning to change my mind.  It had been nearly four months since making the decision to divorce my wife.  We were starting to spend more time together, which included the most open forum of conversation that we had experienced in years.  It seemed as if we were breaking into a new area of our relationship.  The possibility of a better us was enough motivation to stall the decision to divorce.

My expectations were unrealistic.  I was to blame for the hope that I allowed to creep into my own feelings.  How could I blame her for wanting to fight for the marriage, while making sure that certain things or people were in place in case I proceeded with the divorce?  The delay in filing for the divorce back fired.  Somehow I failed to make my intentions clear enough, and create a space in time for us to make the decision together.  In the end, my word were more important to her, or the words I did not say, then my actions.

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